AS THE SPRIT WANES THE FORM APPEARS

try
bleeding is believing
i saw you crawling on the floor
why
bleeding is breathing
you're hiding
underneath the smoke in the room

i saw you falling to the floor

my lullaby hung out to dry, what's up with that? it's over

can't play well enough/can't sing high enough/can't scream loud enough/can't run fast enough/can't be slim enough/can't be wise enough/can't love pure enough/
can't hurt hard enough

some men never
die some men never live

but we're all alive
tonight.

and truly, i don't weep, do you?

(i just hope he doesn't tell anybody
i'm not pretty)

something real.

I am not in a highly emotional state, in fact, though I am weakened and feeble, I must and will contemplate-

I'm not sure I've ever felt a love in this exact sense. There have been the few times where I've been close to leaving this life for good, and I felt him near to me as never before. He held me, and told me to take heart, because he had overcome the world. And now I feel him again-this man who all my life had watched me grow, and waited patiently for the day that I would open my eyes and see him there, and open my heart to him. It's been hard most of the time. I'll never understand why, but for some reason I've always preferred another man-even though I could feel him with me still- watching me longingly from a distance somewhere. Even when I moved with the other in the dark, where there was no light to be found and I was sleeping with the lie, I could hear him in my head-saying come, come take what I have to give-you don't have to offer me your body-I will love you for free, and I'll never leave you. All these other men promise the same, but they all go. They take you and leave you there alone. They touch your skin with a seduction despair. But I never have forced my love on you, because, see, my love doesn't do that. I cared so intimately and deeply for you that I could not bare to have you without your consent. I'd give anything to have you seek me. I'd even do this-when my son was born to me, I made it my will to crush him. It is the hardest thing one could ever do-to turn your face on your own child-but see Diana, that is how much I would give to have you near me. I grieve each day you run away. My heart burns and aches unending as I witness how you give yourself to these things...these books with ideas that leave you empty, these men that leave you broken, these knifes that leave you bruised...all of these things you hide behind. But why? What are you afraid of? That you will find the light I have hidden inside you? I want to be your Abba, I want to protect you like a Father. I am here, I am here always. I have written for you that when my son died, he saw his offspring-that's you. As he hung there, and as he felt every hopeless and degraded woe you have ever imagined-he saw your face, your tears and your cries-and he did it for you.

I hear this man-this beautiful man who's never, ever hit me, or stolen things from me, or left me alone-this beautiful man...saying these things, to me. The best musician I could ever desire. The most vivid creator. The brightest intellectual. The greatest mind one could ever, or ever not, imagine. This beautiful person wants to have me fall in love with Him. I don't know if I could do it...I'm so used to my habits and my sodden distractions here, who knows what could happen if I lifted my eyes and gave it all to Him? It's terrifying...but truly, something deep down is struggling to reach the surface. This vulnerability, this disappointed and disenchanted soul, something saves me. Something reaches down where I cannot breathe and gives me life.

I will lift my eyes up.
I will trust it.

"For the mountains may depart and the hills be removed,
but my steadfast love shall not depart from you,
and my covenant of peace shall not be removed,' says the LORD.
'Oh afflicted one, storm-tossed and not comforted,
behold, I will set your stones in antimony,
and lay your foundations with sapphires...
In righteousness you shall be established;
you shall be far from oppression, for you shall not fear,
and from terror, for it shall not come near you."
Isaiah 54:10-11, 14

a thought on suicide-

"How can one fail to feel the basic relationship of these minds! How can one fail to see that they take their stand around a privileged and bitter moment in which hope has no further place? I want everything to be explained to me or nothing.

And the reason is impotent when it hears this cry from the heart. The mind aroused by this insistence seeks and finds nothing but contradictions and nonsense. What I fail to understand is nonsense. The world is peopled with such irrationals. The world itself, who's single meaning I do not understand, is but a vast irrational.

If one could only say just once: 'This is clear,' all would be saved. But these men vie with one another in proclaiming that nothing is clear, all is chaos, that all man has is his lucidity and his definite knowledge of the walls surrounding him.

All these experiences agree and confirm one another. The mind, when it reaches its limits, must make a judgement and choose its conclusions. This is where suicide, and the reply, stand."

-Albert Camus, The Myth of Sisyphus

After the know, September, 2009.

see this flaming torch it burns me so
see this ashen ember grow
when this fever child is running sham-ed
eyes are bleeding red

see this rotten log crumble above me
see my palms up to the sky
Eastern winds are blowing violent
when the oceans are all dry

Oh daughters hide your faces softly
mothers shield your sons
when red skies burn and fevers blossom
will we make it past the end-

see these bruises pushing on my eyes
see my spirit broken fade
children's wails and empty caskets
leave you wanting where he laid

Oh daughters hide your faces softly
mothers shield your sons
when red skies burn and fevers blossom
will we make it past the end?????????????????????????????????????????????????????

I'LL MAKE MY OWN DEVICES

"THE ANGER THAT CAUSES THE SHAKE AND THE CRY IS FOR NOTHING BUT THIS:

I DON'T NEED YOU OR YOUR SELFISH SODDING SATURATION
SATURATION OF THE CULT SATURATION OF InEXPERIENCE
Saturations of WHAT!
(this anger, i know, will lead to the phlegmatic destruction, but)
EMPTY NOTHINGS SIT STAGNANT BETWEEN YOUR EARS
GET ME OUT OF HERE BEFORE SOMETHING FALLS
BECAUSE IT CAN ONLY BE YOU OR I
WE CANNOT COEXIST MUCH LONGER, OR I WILL FORSAKE IT ALL

i will make my own devices because everything that this stage is offering me is
ALL FOR NAUGHT
there are the ones, the few, that would have me sane
and the Real? Well he's far away-
And since I cannot find it, well, I'll just
MAKE MY OWN DEVICES
FOR WHAT ELSE CAN I DO,
WHEN I AM THE ONLY ONE I CAN TRUST?
HOW CAN I TRUST HIM TO CATCH ME?
(and don't spit your remedy here, babe)-"


"So we all
Are growing old
And it's getting old

Pressure on
Our hollow bones
And the (varicose)?

Suddenly
We decompose
But we're not alone

So we all
Are growing old
MAYBE WE'RE SEALED IN SILENCE
And maybe we feel a guidance
Maybe your own devices
Will keep you afraid and cold
But I

Memorized
Your smile lines
From left to right

(Candlelight)?
And childlike
Reaction time

We're allowed
To expire

So we all
Are growing old
PULL OUT THE FEAR of silence
And put out the need for guidance
And put out your own devices
And don't be afraid of the cold

And we sing, sing, sing.
Fight, we fight, fight.
We cry, cry, cry.
We slide, slide, we slide into the light?

Pull out the fear of silence
Put out the need for guidance
Put out your own devices
And don't be afraid of the cold
Afraid of the cold
Afraid of the time
You've got no where to go but here.""

"But oh Savannah,"
BUT GOD-

how do i get back to where i was (when you were smiling)

(don't just sit there and shake your head, just close your eyes.
it's all you can do, isn't it?)

Patron Saint, are we all lost like you?

Take what you will, what you will
And leave. Could you kill, could you kill me
If the world was on fire
and nothing was left but hope or desire
And take all that I could require, is this love?
Or am I on the floor over-desperate?
Hold hands streaming of blood again?
And then take full weight of me
Guard my dreams, figure this out,
It's me on my own. Helpless, hurting, hell.
Will you stay strong as you promised?
Cause I'm stranded and bare.
Meanness is washed up and all that I have
is God. Take this and all,
Then grace takes me to a place
Of the father you never had
Ripping and breaking and tearing apart
This is not heaven
This is my hell.

why doesn't anyone in Noro sleep

Little light lead us through the night
And if we die burn down the forest
Chariots, carry us
Distances we don't care to walk

I'm on my way to hell
I'm on my way to hell

Why doesn't anyone in Noro sleep
Are they all just scared of their dreams
When they lay down their heads down at night
What are they haunted by
Why won't anyone just close their eyes
Could it hurt them to rest for a while
Do they need their friend to be a lover
Or their lover to be a friend

(Because)
I'm on my way to hell
(Well I've tried, God knows that I've tried)
I'm on my way to hell
(One time, Two time, Three time again)

Sitting duck
Running out of luck
And I got stuck on the train crossing
How am I ever gonna know peace
How will I ever see the light through the trees
I wanna burn down everything we begun
I wanna kill and eat my young

(Because)
I'm on my way to hell
(Well I've tried, God knows that I've tried)
I'm on my way to hell
(One time, Two time, Three time again)
I'm on my way to hell
(Well I've tried, God knows that I've tried)
I'm on my way to hell
(One time, Two time, Three time again)

I'm on my way to hell

Jesse Lacey

i swear i'd do anything,

and these tears are falling, not because of what i have done because of what i continue to do-

how many times, how many circumstances will approach that do invite me to share myself-
no, not share, give

how many times will i lose myself for someone's music, their feel,
their philosophies of pain

/Nietzsche and Kierkegaard continuously fight for my soul/

"My words will tear new scars where the old ones used to end.
Will you be wounded again and do you remember?"

i live and learn, and don't learn.

all will be well, but God help me-
these scars will not heal,
they continue to break and glow
and the nerves are raw...

Danse Macabre-

"He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you."

-Friedrich Nietzsche, Beyond Good and Evil, Aphorism 146

(Dostoevsky, Kierkegaard, Nietzsche or Kafka? Whom shall I pay the most heed?)

Listening to Totentanz, and tomorrow will be reminded of the light by Tchaikovsky...

sono vicino la ferma?

(I assess the power of a will by how much resistance, pain, torture it endures and knows how to turn to its advantage.)


Friedrich Nietzsche

gasoline

for he has not despised or abhorred the afflictions of the afflicted, and he has not hidden his face from him, but has heard, when he cried to him-

when these violent delights meet violent ends-

(C#m, tell yourself as you're searching the ground, nobody cares, nobody cares-)

"If affection is made the absolute sovereign of a human life, the seeds will germinate. Love, having become a god, becomes a demon." (C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves)

Abba, Father, Daddy, King, -

How does one battle not the plights of circumstance, but the inertly fallen curse of love? To be in want of affection? How, indeed? For it is not the condition, situation or incident that is my demon, it is the ghost of things had, things longed for; things remembered violently that angst me. It is the inner core of a struggle against the give-love, and the need-love, the selfishly and selflessly created hurt in a masochism of hope.

This hope is killing you, Diana.
Well, dum spiro, spero- As long as I breathe, I hope.

And Neitzsche...Hope is the worst of evils, because it prolongs the torment of a man...

Dearest friend, you were so alone, and aren't we all-

Bipolarity. Perverted dichotomies of what should be and what is. The wheels in my mind will always turn a certain way, whether I will them to or not. It's inert, I can't change it, but I can't accept it, I won't forfeit myself to this legion, even as they all scream my name in regards to the lack of solidarity and curse of HOPE-and then, what is left?

The same as you: more confusion, torment and hopelessness than when I began.
b u t g o d -

(hope
in God, for I shall again praise Him, my salvation and my God)-

are your wonders known in this place of darkness-oh God, but they are-

(and i've lost who i am, and i can't understand why my heart is so broken, this rejecting Your love)-

ALL SAID AND DONE I STAND ALONE, ALONE, AND IT'S BETTER THIS WAY

all said and done i stand alone
amongst remains of A LIFE I SHOULD NOT OWN
it takes all i am to believe in the mercy that covers me

god(please)damn this black night, god(won't You)damn the daylight
it's too much to bear my load and your weights too
i can't hack it, i remember now why selfish happens

what.i.have.set.before.you.is.not.too.difficult.for.you.

God you have given me intellect, you have given me choices, you have given me
resistance and a way out, escape route-
but these agonies show no light in the end of this drain
all i have is the fading light deep inside, so dim i can barely make it out
you've robbed me of my senses, i pray that when all external perception fails and fades
You will still be there, throwing traffic cones in my direction, screaming
LOOK OUT, THE END IS NEAR, DON'T GO, DON'T GO, DON'T GO,

and somewhere, someone will be violently whispering
with the purest voice

take heart, little Christy,
For I Have Overcome The World-

sirens at night in cold air

we are the cancer, yes
we are the virus
tell me it's not too late, oh God,
tell me it's not too late-

and pretending i don't feel misplaced-

It's easier to run
Replacing this pain with something numb
It's so much easier to go
Than face all this pain here all alone

Something has been taken from deep inside of me
The secret I've kept locked away no one can ever see
Wounds so deep they never show they never go away
Like moving pictures in my head for years and years they've played

(If I could change I would take back the pain I would)
(Retrace every wrong move that I made I would)
(If I could stand up and take the blame I would)
(If I could take all the shame to the grave I would)

It's easier to run
Replacing this pain with something numb
It's so much easier to go
Than face all this pain here all alone

Sometimes I remember the darkness of my past
Bringing back these memories I wish I didn't have
Sometimes I think of letting go and never looking back
And never moving forward so there'd never be a past

(If I could change I would take back the pain I would)
(Retrace every wrong move that I made I would)
(If I could stand up and take the blame I would)
(If I could take all the shame to the grave I would)
(If I could change I would take back the pain I would)
(Retrace every wrong move that I made I would)
(If I could stand up and take the blame I would)
(I would take all my shame to the grave)

Just washing it aside
All of the helplessness inside
PRETENDING I DON'T FEEL MISPLACED-
It's so much simpler than change

[Chorus]
It's easier to run
Replacing this pain with something numb
It's so much easier to go
Than face all this pain here all alone

-Chester wrote this one.

I HAVE FELT THE SAME.

catch your breath hit the wall
scream out loud as you start to crawl
back in your cage the only place
where they will leave you alone
because the weak will seek the weaker until they've broken them
could you get it back again
Would it be the same?
fulfillment to their lack of strength at your expense
left you with no defense they tore it down and

I HAVE FELT THE SAME AS YOU
I HAVE FELT THE SAME AS YOU
I HAVE FELT THE SAME-

locked inside the only place
where you feel sheltered where you feel safe
you lost yourself in your search to find
something else to hide behind
the fearful always preyed upon your confidence
did they see the consequence when they pushed you around
the arrogant build kingdoms made of the different ones
breaking them 'til they've become just another crown

refuse to feel, anything at all
refuse to slip, refuse to fall
can't be weak, can't stand still
watch your back
because no one will

you don't know why they had to go This far
TRADED YOUR WORTH FOR THESE SCARS
for your only company
don't believe the lies that they told to you
Yeah not one word was true you're alright,
you're alright, you're alright

-Simon

2.3.

choking out to such a piano riff,
i try to snap back to reality
and witness the bile that characterizes this situation
this cycle of love and madness
and i'm fallin and ballin so hard the breath is a joke

I won't always love what I'll never have
I won't always live in my regret

the same song/the same muse/the same shipwreck-

these choices long prior made and decided
are killing me,
and today when the old friend told me
"diana, this hope is killing you"
i listened
and knew
that unless something changed,
he was right.

THE THINGS WE LAID DO NOT AMOUNT TO MUCH-

we are the fake,
we are the damned
and the damned will not be heard here
any longer

and,

That's when it turned on me
A motorcade of 'meant to be's'
Parades of beauty queens
Where soft entwines make kindling
These many detailed things
LIKE BROKEN NAILS AND PLASTIC RINGS
Will win by keeping me
From speaking to my new darling
And there's no way to know
Our future foe scenarios
That's when it turned on me
Where bobby pins hold angel wings

w h e r e a r e y o u g o i n g

this [apprehensive] carefree could very possibly
be more dangerous than this recent affliction,
and yet i find myself remaining here-

g o d b l e s s t h e l o s t c a u s e s

Trois Pensées

Un: Wet piano keys are not the answer

Deux: i'm soddingly tired of this testing of faith

Trois: god[please]damn this inhumanistic dependence

"trust your souls to a faithful creator in doing what is right."

HOW?

i am still here

"I call this Divine humility because it is a poor thing to strike our colours to God when the ship is going down under us; a poor thing to come to Him as a last resort, to offer up 'our own' when it is no longer worth keeping. If God were proud, He would hardly have us on such terms: but He is not proud, He stoops to conquer, He will have us even though we have shown that we prefer everything else to Him, and come to Him because there is "nothing better" now to be had."

-Clive Staples Lewis, The Problem of Pain (1940)

Father God, Forgive me. In this rare moment of clarity, I cannot believe it, I cannot see it, and yet I earnestly ask:
If it takes this torment and strife to feel your presence cradling my very soul, to where yet again i find you sheltering me in the shadow of your wings, I ask you would keep me here for as long as it takes. There is beauty in this rain, it is so beautiful, because, in a sense, I am seeing Your compassion in a way like I never have before...

there is no rest

life feels different when you're wasting affections

there may be no rest, but there is always hope-

THERE'S ALWAYS A SIREN SINGING YOU TO SHIPWRECK (but God, and one year later) -

8.28.09 - 9.15.10
so much has changed; so much remains the same-

We spoke of wrists that burn, loves that leave gaping holes, and a gentler day to come; we shared the space, making plans of friendship and hope, and I kissed her on the shoulder-

God-

(it's me again).

I was not aware that feeling such a multitude of different emotions/opinions/affections was indeed possible by a lowly human. Am I simply a lover of sights and sounds, or may I somehow achieve a transcendent knowledge of You, so that when I find myself thrashing for help, I may know in the raw core of myself that You are there?

(she appears composed, so she is, i suppose. who can really tell) -

Christ my trials are lofty, and comical in the face of the stripes you bore. And what do I bare these lines for? Who am I helping endure? How can I further your kingdom? Oh God, if somehow this could only be for Your glory-

I paint these words and play these notes in vain if I may not come out the better in the end, Father they say I am strong (God is good and you are strong) but how? I see her scars and i feel them, why can't we fix each other? The breath comes in gasps/the lone tear blackens the face/the existential loneliness hides under the bones and i need you more than yesterday,

(when i'm at the pearly gates, this will be on my videotape)

Daddy the flesh screams to me, and I don't want to be this vulnerable. The fluttery feelings have flown but the deep seeded rejection remains, I don't want to be the lover they don't have to love, the circles whisper as does the blade-the dull scissors as a precaution to preserve the life that a few have placed so much hope in-
(Christ what if i only let them down?)

i am so easily given/i am so easily taken and by this she means the same thing-

(don't reach out, don't reach out, don't reach out, there's always a siren singing you to shipwreck, Diana)

I am writing without aim. But will somehow be alright -do you see it? She's still singing- because I choose now to serve Him, God is hiding me in his shadow, and I will make it. I will forgive those who hurt me, and I will love them more than I could ever imagine, and Christ will make the impossible circumstance beautiful and He will use it to his glory (God, I beg you, use this pain to your glory, do not let me weep in vain-)

My family. My loved ones, my friends. My voice.
My grades and discipline. Money.
The wrists that scream.
The flesh that calls.

God I give you these things, are earnestly beg you to take them and fix them in ways I have attempted and failed for 24 years. Father take this shoddy echo of a life and give it purpose. May my voice please you again. May you hold my heart and use it to love others in the way you have called me to. Jesus, you promised me you'd be with me, even unto the end of the age. Father, please hold me close and still my breaths-

No matter what happens now
I won't be afraid
Because I know today has been the most perfect day
I've ever seen

humanity, you never had it anyway

oh clove, the moon and the Cure
this portuguese dark rhythym breathes sordid beats in my ears
i have so much to say and absolutely no way to say it
what have i done to bring about this curse

i'll tell you what i did,
i looked for it in all the wrong places
everything i hear is like liquid smoke
which forms ecstasy and agony entwined
how do i make it go, how do i make it go,
how do i feel indifferently

why aren't my eyes black enough, i have never lied to you,
but, if we are being honest here, i suppose
i have also never told you anything true

o, let me tell you what i've done
o, if i could whisper you what i've done

you wouldn't believe me if i told you
and worse

it wouldn't matter

justanothercreaturedizzywithlove

road flies under too fast
karen o screams from this lung
red ash caught in my eyelid
and i cannot make them black enough

i'm running fast without a map
not even a compass to reign me in
this is fear
and if perfect love drives that out
i have never known love before

isis isis isis black and red/fucked by the muse/if even the savior has suffered confusion is there any hope for me hope for me hope for me no,

oh but this cross,

i know it now,

i shall never leave this muse that tempts and dies to find me damned (and this muse is truly but sin)
until things make sense for the first time, because
i am so easily given (to all)
i am so easily taken (with the muse)
and by this i mean the same thing-

oh but this cross, i cannot shake it, it's there, brighter than all these tears,
more terrible and beautiful and quiet and thrashed and tranquil, oh but this cross-

it screams to me in the softest voice,
take heart, little christy,

for I have overcome the world.

she's still singing-

i've got the joy, joy, joy, joy

i knew it when you showed me this song.
i knew it when i first played this song.
and i know it now:

i can't understand
and i can't pretend
that this will be alright in the end
so i'll try my best
and lift up my chest
and i'll sing above this

joy.

Hope IN God, for I shall again praise Him.

this same accidental art, and dearest friend:

oh give me chemical, chemical.
this has no reason or rhyme, it will just come.
but sod the formalities.

I cannot write like you, but if you will humor me, I’ll tell you what I know.

If you scratch my surface, I will be smiling when I see you. I bring people together through my music and sometimes controversial conversations, and I am always willing to purchase a cassette of what I think you might like. I have an impeccable ear for pitch, and I strive to excel in school. The trunk of my car is always messy, even when I clean the rest of it. I like to take pictures as much as anyone else, and though I have black hair, I am energetic and often the center of a burst of laughter.

There is something I can’t share as easily. More often than not, there is a bloody plethora of ideas/tensions/confusion/pain circling around between my ears, and I do not know how to get it out. I can be curt with you, I can be rude, reactive, seemingly unfeeling, or distant, but I cannot articulate what’s there. There is something at work that prevents me from simply conveying what I need to. You, soul, know what's there-what has us smiling genuine one moment and writhing in rose agony the next... This seductive demon muse who whispers foul nothings in our ear and waits for us to crack- It’s the biggest mother fucking curse, and it falls on someone like me, who needs to communicate and impart and connect. Why would God place such a passion inside, an utter lust to share their thoughts, in someone without the gift of expression? God, why?
(the best part is, that on the surface, they see how I wear my heart on my sleeve. I don’t, actually. If they just only knew.)


What I’m writing is bullshit, nothing more than you view of yours, but you understand how sometimes, if you don’t throw it up anyway, the pacifying alternatives hurt more than just yourself.

The worst is, I could get there. I could be close to conveying a beauty, something worth while, something bigger than this. But Christ how? My music now, is mediocre. Decent at best. But that’s not the pain-the pain is what I could be and that i cannot ascertain how to reach it.

Then there are the post-demons. I am haunted by the memories, like you. The conglomeration of bleeding out from the release, having something so precious stolen at 19 on the trunk of a car, and, following the loss, freely giving what was meant to be so different-and now writhing and weeping on the floor of the shower, the face wet so as to hide the truth in the face-Oh Christ, what have we become?

And now, oh God, the courage of my memory. Do you see it? She’s still singing-

Catch your breath hit the wall scream out loud as you start to crawl back in your cage
The only place where they will leave you alone
Because the weak will seek the weaker until they've broken them
Could you get it back again
Would it be the same fulfillment to their lack of strength
At your expense, left you with no defense they tore it down and
I have felt the same as you, I've felt the same as you, I've felt the same

Locked inside the only place
Where you feel sheltered where you feel safe
YOU LOST YOURSELF IN YOUR SEARCH TO FIND,
SOMETHING ELSE TO HIDE BEHIND
The fearful always preyed upon your confidence
Did they see the consequence when they pushed you around
The arrogant build kingdoms made of the different ones
Breaking them 'til they've become just another crown

Refuse to feel, Anything at all refuse to slip, Refuse to fall
Can't be weak, Can't stand still you watch your back,
Because no one will...
You don't know why they had to go this far
TRADED YOUR WORTH FOR THESE SCARS, YOUR ONLY COMPANY-
Don't believe the lies that they told to you
Not one word was true you're alright, You're alright,
You're alright

and i leave you with this bloody bandage and yet unmistakable will:

Because the Screams of Romeo Are No Longer Heard, And Because this Daphne Was So Cruel, I Cannot Scream Loud Enough.

But, because the truth will not stand hidden, hope in God, for I shall again praise Him.

when my own music does bring these fates

o lovers in the dark you do move and i do see you
the woman on the wall she only haunts me evermore
her face/themuse/ i'd die to be
stunning gentlemen soft and mysteriously

oh daughters hide your faces softly,

SEE THIS FLAMING TORCH IT BURNS ME SO
WHEN THIS ASHEN EMBER GLOWS
AND THIS FEVER CHILD IS RUNNING SHAMED
EYES ARE BLEEDING RED

see this rotten log crumble above me
see my palms up to the sky
eastern winds are blowing violent
when the coeans are all dry

see these bruises pushing on my eyes
see my spirit broken fade
children's wails and empty caskets
leave you wanting where he laid-

OH DAUGHTERS HIDE YOUR FACES SHOFTLY
MOTHERS SHEILD YOUR SONS
WHEN RED SKIES BURN AND FEVERS BLOSSOM
WILL WE MAKE IT PAST THE END-