8.4.09

torment of least importance


i have come to an unsettling conclusion.

i have absolutely no God-given idea what constitutes good art, good music, good anything.

sure, it's about truth, and what i make of it in some regards, but who the hell wants me justifying their creation?

there's no black and white, and it is safe to say that this torments me.

the last thing i want is the people around me, or the media, forming my opinion on what is justifiably good or bad. but then who does? when God seems so far, how do I come to these opinions and correct conclusions? don't tell me that piss in a jar is bad and a Degas is good. who decides this?

MAYBE THIS IS NOT THAT BIG OF A DEAL. but as i said, it's safe to say it torments me.

how will my art ever be worthwhile if i can't even tell what's good or bad?
why is all my music so damnably safe?
how do i even understand who i am when
EVERYTHING IS RELATIVE.

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